I enjoy observing people. I can sit in a cafe with some coffee and cigarettes and stare out into the midst quite content. I find people fascinating. Those who usually pique my interest most often have a quirk about them, be it their; sexuality, creed or demeanor. Tramps, queers, loners, geeks. To quench my thirst I’d come up with small ways to make general conversation like not buy a lighter. Not only does it fill the loneliness with small talk but means you smoke less.
At a loss for new ideas, I came up with the bright idea to sign on. To sign on; the dole, the UB40, Giro, welfare, claiming benefits, being a parasite to society. Here I would see the dregs of society, doing what they’re despised for. The problem was, somewhere along the way, their lifestyle became somewhat appealing.
Half jokingly I entered the grotty building up in Kingston and went to the welcome desk. After a 20min informal chat she booked an appointment and off I went. Quite scared I wasn’t entitled to sign on, being a fit 18 year old who’d just finished formal education, I insisted that she check my eligibility. I eagerly waited, half wanting to be rejected so as not to cheat the state out of it’s coffers. No No, she insisted. Another session of informal chats and I was on.
The room wasn’t how I imagined it. The people were. You’d see the woman feigning injury boisterously demanding her god given right, the father avoiding eye contact, eyes nailed to the floor and those of colour keeping to themselves. My dad reads the Daily Mail, being an easy read and without the long words or titillation that the papers it straddles entails. My preconceptions were therefore, lines of asylum seekers, eyes with glee as they received their weekly spend. In reality it was quite the opposite.
Signing on is ridiculously easy. I’m a full supporter for a welfare state but it’s too tempting to stay like this and claim. I’d like to say i’ll get a job and repay my debt to society as fast as possible, but realistically i’ll spend my time studying so I can jet off to Vietnam and teach English.
I’m on £44.50 a week. I sign on every two weeks on a Monday at 11:40 opposite the 99p store. I write this in the hope that people will come and stone me. I deserve it.
